22nd September 2011


Alright Mal,

How are you my friend? Myself, I'm cushty. Well, let me tell you: since my last letter to you, the very next morning, I woke up to 25 screws at my door with one of the Governors of the prison telling me that I am being taken to the "BLOCK !" So, since then I have been held in Solitary Confinement. At the moment it's back to basics for me: 23 hour bang-up, no TV, a shower every other day, 1 piece of writing paper a week, clean prison clothes at their discretion. I started off with a mattress on the floor but I've now got myself a bed ... Yeeeeehaaaaaa! Even the cockroaches down here have prison numbers Ha Ha!

I ain't been nicked and can not be nicked for anything now, as they have to charge me within the first 48 hours; but that doesn't mean they can't keep me here in the unit. I am being held on "Security Reasons." Fuck me, I've heard that one a few times!!

Anyway, the next day I go before the Governor (a different one to the one who came and gave me that rude awakening). He told me the reason I am in the unit which I have just told you (Security Reasons). To be fair, I was concentrating more on the great picture he had behind him of our beloved Queen. As I left the room I did smile and give her a wink and said "Quality picture Guv!!"

Anyway, I can still receive mail, so I just want to let people know that it might take me a little longer to reply than usual. Saying that, the Screws have been good as gold with me when I come out for a whole 30 seconds to pick my dinner up and they have been giving me my half hour exercise. The exercise yard is like a Cat 'A' yard: it's 12 steps long by 8 steps wide but at least it's a bit of fresh air ... though it's been a bit nippy out there in this Redneck outback gaff!!

The worst they can do is keep me until February. To be fair I had a touch coming down here ... I couldn't listen to or see Chelsea lose to Man United Ha Ha!

The Governor told me I was getting shipped out, to which I replied "Fantastic!" but that might not be the case, as the prisons are bursting at the seams for space, so we'll see. But if I do my mail will get forwarded on to me and if I don't it will give me something to read, so KEEP THEM COMING ... THANKS.

Well, that's about all from Paranoid Security Lockdown Villas, so until next time remember to take care, stay sharp and "ONLY THE STRONG SURVIVE."

The General

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